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Links to Human Sites
This is a list of sites made by your kind. They are mostly humorous to me in their simplicity and lack of understanding. In fact, I truly enjoy visiting the Web sites you create that attempt to explain what vampires are really like. I hope you enjoy these sites as much as I did.

The Vampire’s Daughter
This site is sweet. A vampire takes in the daughter of one of his victims. The only problem is that a real vampire would simply kill the daughter and revel in the fact that he or she had gotten two kills for the price of one.

Free Vampire Stories
As if posting his own stories wasn’t enough, the misguided author of The Vampire’s Daughter seems to have created a sister site where anyone can post their vampire stories. Oh, this should provide me with endless hours of entertainment as more and more people post their ridiculous stories to the site. I can hardly wait!

Bram Stoker's Dracula
This is, of course, one of the first vampire novels. They even made a movie out of it (I wouldn't mind taking a few drops from Ms. Ryder myself) with big name stars. Too bad both the book and the movie are so foolishly off base. Still, it is an entertaining read!

Blue Blood Magazine
These people must be insane. Do they really think vampires dress like this? No, these people just like to put on ridiculous clothing and prance around attracting attention to themselves. I do have to say, however, that some of these people would make delectable victims. And, they would probably willing let a vampire kill them. What fools!

The Coven Organization
A site for “real” vampires. Oh my, how silly. To be fair, the site has much to offer humans, such as a page full of interesting drink concoctions, but there is nothing of interest to my kind. After all, why waste our time with human food when we can so easily have humans as food.

Cool Vampire Links
A source of never ending tomfoolery! This fellow spends his time visiting vampire sites and reviews them. Does he have nothing better to do with his time? I understand how I might consider taking a break now and then to look at a vampire site—after all they are about me. But spending all day scouring the Internet for vampires when you should be making sure to protect yourself from them, that is plain stupid. I have, however, found some interesting sites through his wasted efforts.

White Wolf
This is a great site for all of you pathetic humans who wish you were like my kind. This company not only sells books about vampires, but it also sells games that let you pretend you are one. If I could only be a fly on the wall watching you play this game, I’m sure I would be unable to stop myself from laughing.

Bela-Lugosi
A site dedicated to the memory of that hack Bela Lugosi. According to the site, he was the most prominent vampire of all time. What foolishness! This man had no idea what vampires are like and his pathetic attempts at acting like a vampire prove it.